


Perfection (2008)

by JennyB



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Community: 30kisses, Cute Ending, Gen, Snark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-01-31
Updated: 2008-01-31
Packaged: 2018-07-12 03:33:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7083643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JennyB/pseuds/JennyB
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gojyo is left tending to an ill Sanzo, and the two of them have an animated discussion about Gojyo's 'perfection', and Sanzo's type.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Perfection (2008)

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the LJ community 30kisses, prompt#10 - '#10'

"Tell me again how the hell I wound up with you," Sanzo groused petulantly as he sniffled into a Kleenex. "And why are you still here, anyway? I'm not a child."

Gojyo smirked as he lit up a cigarette. He was enjoying the opportunity to harass the priest far too much. Exhaling smugly, he said, "Someone has to look after your sick ass. You know, tend to your every whim, make sure you don't have to lift a finger – kind of like usual, except for the fact that you're in bed." He ignored the warning growl from the blond as he opened a can of beer and took a long drink. "Hakkai couldn't stay because _you_ don't trust me and Goku to do the shopping, and Goku couldn't stay because it's almost lunch time, and he'd have bugged you to be fed, so you wouldn't have gotten any rest. Besides, he remembered that Hakkai had promised him some sort of treat and wanted to go with him." He snorted in amusement. "'Kai thinks we've been neglecting the saru lately. Shit, Goku's got him just wrapped around his little finger." He stabbed out his filter, and then finished off his beer. "So that means you get me. And that makes today your lucky day. I _am_ a ten after all."

"A ten?" Sanzo repeated as he lit a cigarette of his own, his expression almost daring the redhead to try and stop him. "Out of what? A hundred?" The resulting smirk flitted across the blond's face for a fraction of a second.

Gojyo frowned, and it was obvious from the expression on his face that he was trying to keep his cool. "No, jackass, out of ten. You know, as in _a perfect ten_?"

The priest arched a brow as he reached over to tap his ash into the ashtray. "You think you're a perfect ten? God, your vanity is boundless."

"Hey, I'm just repeating what the ladies tell me," the kappa replied smoothly. "I didn't write the advertisement, but I'll certainly pass along the message."

"Really." A tart smirk settled on the monk's face, and as he crushed out the heater on his smoke, he asked, "And how the hell did they come to that conclusion? You're noisy, ill-mannered, sloppy, lazy, unmotivated, undisciplined, arrogant, chauvinistic –"

"Hey, you're no picnic, either, _Sanzo-sama_! You're all of those things, too!"

"What's the matter, Kappa? Truth hurt?" The blond's eyes sparked with a hint of life. He really did enjoy getting the other riled up, and he could see that Gojyo was starting to get hot under the collar. "Yeah, I'm all those things. But I also never claimed to be a ten, did I?" He smirked and propped himself up in bed. "Alright, since you're my damned nursemaid for the day, why don't you go get me a beer, and tell me how it is you think you're this icon of perfection, ne?"

The hanyou snorted. "I'm not your fucking nursemaid. More like disgruntled babysitter. And Hakkai said you couldn't have beer – but he made some miso and left it if you want it."

Sanzo scowled. "Bastard," he murmured. "Like you never break the rules," he added, though he did, albeit reluctantly, accept a mug of the hot soup. "Well? Let's hear it."

Gojyo shrugged as he settled himself backwards on a chair, his arms draped over the slats. He held a freshly opened can of beer in his hands, and he made a point of taking a long, noisy drink. He wasn't really thirsty for it, but he did want it more for spite than anything. As he gazed at the other male, a slow smirk curved across his features. "Alright. The babes are my toughest critics, and they can't seem to get enough of this. Some like the sculpted abs, and the well-defined muscles in my arms. Others are hot for my long legs. I have smooth, tanned skin, a rugged jaw, killer smile, and the tightest ass this side of the Yangtze. But the thing that really gets the chicks warm for my form are my killer moves in the bedroom. Some have even likened me to an Adonis." A debonair smile settled on his face, and he gave the blond a wink. "It's a curse I will reluctantly bear."

The priest actually started to laugh when Gojyo had finished. "You really are shameless, you know that?"

The redhead simply shrugged as he lit up another cigarette. "As the song says, _'Oh Lord, it's hard to be humble when you're perfect in every way.'_ You're just jealous."

"Oh please!" The blond rolled his eyes and scowled around the rim of his mug. "Get over yourself; your ego is starting to make the room feel stifling. And I hate to tell you this, but you're far, _far_ from perfect, you stupid, perverted roach."

The kappa snorted. "Whatever. You just wish you could have a piece of this."

"Bite me. In case you've forgotten, I'm a monk, moron. I don't go for that sort of thing, and even if I did, you're sure as hell not my type!"

That caught Gojyo's attention. "You have a type?" he teased, and waggled his eyebrows at the blond. "What is it? Sassy and trampy? The sexy librarian? _Cheerleaders_?"

Sanzo's scowl deepened. "Grow up! What are you? Twelve? Not that it's any of your business, but it's none of those!"

"Come on, Sanzo – blondes, brunettes or redheads?" Gojyo wheedled. "At least tell me that!"

"Shut up before I kill you!"

"I like them all myself."

"Do you want to die?"

"I'm just saying –"

Gojyo was interrupted by the sound of the door opening, Goku and Hakkai having returned from their shopping trip. "Well, you two sound like you're having quite the intense discussion," Hakkai said with a smile as he set the bags they'd brought with them on the table, and he began sorting through everything and putting it away. 

"It was nothing," Sanzo said gruffly as he lit up another cigarette. "Just some random idiocy this jackass started spouting on about. Don't ever leave me alone with this letchy water sprite again, you got me?"

The green-eyed demon chuckled softly. "It really couldn't be helped, Sanzo. And I'm sure Gojyo did a more than adequate job taking care of you. He did give you some of the soup I left, I see."

"Yeah, about that – what the hell's up with telling him I couldn't have a beer? If I'm eating, I'm obviously on the mend."

Hakkai looked surprised at that. "I never told him that."

Violet eyes snapped over to the redhead and narrowed in irritation. "For that, I should kill you, you stupid baka. Kiss your ass goodbye!" He shifted his gaze to the end table beside his bed and began scanning for his gun.

"Hey, hey!" Gojyo said defensively as he held his hands up. "I was just screwing with you. You know, all in good fun and everything!"

"Now Gojyo," Hakkai said gently as he brought the monk a beer. "You should know better than that by now. Three things you never joke with are Sanzo's weapon, his beer, or his cigarettes" He handed the hanyou a fresh carton of his own. "But still, thank you for looking after him. I brought back some fried noodles for you if you'd like them – if not, let me know. Goku has been trying to get his hands on them for the last fifteen minutes."

Crimson eyes widened at that. "Oi! Get the hell away from my noodles, Monkey!" He scowled at the taunting, 'Make me,' he got in return. "I'm going to kick his ass, Hakkai. If you hear him screaming, it's just me putting a stupid chimp out of his misery."

Hakkai laughed at that. "Ok, Gojyo. Try not to spill too much blood, if you don't mind." His friend merely waved him off, and as the youkai came around to pick up Sanzo's empty mug, he said, "Is there anything I can get for you now, or would you like to rest a bit more?"

"I'm fine," Sanzo said somewhat churlishly, and he smoked in silence while the other male puttered around for a moment, fluffed his pillow, and then quietly left him in peace. He watched the empty doorway for a few moments as he finished his beer and crushed out his cigarette. Settling down between his blankets, he rested his head on his pillow and closed his eyes. A small smile, one that none of the other members of his ikkou would ever see, settled on his face. _'Brunettes,'_ he thought as he felt himself drifting off to sleep. _'I like brunettes. And **that one** is a ten.'_


End file.
